The 3 MOST POWERFUL Negotiation Techniques That Will Elevate Every Negotiator
“It’s not the number of tactics you use — it’s how cleanly you execute the right one.”
There’s a reason I always return to these three simple but powerful techniques when working with professionals, students and procurement/sales teams alike. They’re not flashy. They’re not new. But they’re fundamental — and more importantly, they are so often misunderstood or under-practiced that they end up being underutilised.
These techniques are:
2. Summarising
Each one on its own can improve a negotiation. But together — and when practised — they become the bedrock of CONFIDENCE, COMPETENT and COLLABORATIVE negotiation.
1. Asking Open Questions: "Powerful & Risky"
“Information is power” is a well-worn phrase in negotiation. But how we gather that information is often overlooked. Open Questions — those that invite the other person to speak freely and expansively — are essential. They unlock insights, expose motivations and surface constraints. But here’s the twist: asking a question is also a signal.
Every time you ask about something — a deadline, a priority, a reason behind a stance — you’re also revealing something about your interest. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t ask. It means you need to practise:
- When to ask:
Timing matters. Ask too soon and you may not have built rapport; ask too late and the moment’s gone. Also, asking about what matters to you early can reveal your priorities — and give the other party something to leverage.
- What to share before you ask:
A little context can invite a fuller answer, but too much can steer or limit the response.
- How to combine questions with silence:
Ask, then pause. Silence often draws out more detail than a follow-up ever could.
- What to do with the answer:
Don’t just collect info — know how you’ll use it.....Will it support a trade? Help you test a position? Or reframe the discussion?
- Avoid explaining the question:
Once asked, let it land. Explaining gives the other party time to filter their answer or dodge the heart of it.
- Be cautious of double-barrelled questions:
Asking more than one question at a time usually means only one gets answered — and it may not be the one you needed.
- Notice your framing:
Slight differences in wording change the tone and outcome. Practise phrasing questions in multiple ways to find what works best.
- Avoid the wrong question:
Some questions lock people in. For example, asking someone to justify a price may force them to defend it — making it harder to move from later.
These are things that can’t be learned from theory alone... they have to be practiced! I’ve seen negotiators improve dramatically just by practicing open-ended questioning in rapid, four-minute negotiation drills. It’s not about mastering questions — it’s about mastering how to ask them effectively and safely.
Try our FREE NEGOTIATION TASTER to practice your skills!
2. Summarising: "So Much More Than a Recap"
If I had to pick the second most important skill in negotiation (after listening itself), it would be summarising.
But not just any summary.... A labelled summary.
Saying something like “Can I just summarise where I think we are?” or “Let me check my understanding…” is powerful. You’re doing several things at once:
- Demonstrating active listening
- Confirming shared understanding
- Slowing down the pace
- Respecting the other party
- Shifting the tone (especially useful with high-ego or status-sensitive negotiators)
But you must be careful with how you summarise!
Repeating proposals word-for-word, especially numbers, can inadvertently anchor those proposals in the conversation. If someone offers £1,200 per unit and you simply repeat it back, you may make that number more ‘sticky’ in both minds.
Instead....
- Label your summary.
- Rephrase where helpful.
- Avoid repeating numbers that don’t serve your position.
- And always try to summarise the other party’s view first, then your own. Why? Because people tend to keep discussing the last thing they heard. So end on your position.
Again — this isn’t just something to know. It’s something to practice deliberately in real scenarios. Observation exercises, where one party listens and summarises, are a brilliant way to build this skill.
Try our FREE NEGOTIATION TASTER to practice your skills!
3. “If You, Then We”: The Formula for Constructive Movement
This phrase is, in my view, is the...
"Engine of progress in a negotiation."
It represents the shift from concession to conditional cooperation — from giving something away to creating purposeful exchange.
Too often, negotiators move simply because they feel pressure. They concede without asking for anything in return. But this teaches the other party a dangerous lesson:
“You’ll move without reason — so I’ll keep pushing.”
That’s how we end up feeding what I call “the animal of greed.” The other party keeps nibbling away at your position until there’s nothing left to take — and only then might they offer token movements of their own.
“If You, Then We” is how you inject purpose into your concessions. It reframes negotiation as an exchange, not a surrender.
- “If you can bring the timeline forward, then we can absorb the delivery cost.”
- “If you can commit to volume, then we can revisit the rate.”
"This is not just about language — it’s a mindset."
You only move when the other party does something in return and here’s where the earlier two techniques link in: your open questions help you gather what the other side values, and your summaries help you check their priorities. Then you use that insight to make conditional offers that make sense.
You’re establishing a principle:
"Movement is available, but only through contribution"
Why the Order Matters...
The single most important tip with this technique is this:
"State the CONDITION first — before the CONCESSION"
If you begin with your concession (“We could offer free delivery…”), you risk the other party latching onto it before you’ve even had a chance to explain why. You’re left chasing the condition afterwards — and it’s likely to be ignored.
But when you say .... “If you can do X, then we can offer Y,”
.... you anchor the condition first. The other party is forced to listen for the rest, and you maintain control of the exchange.
It also holds their attention. They wait to hear what the concession is — and that brief moment of delay means your condition hangs in the air just a little longer, which strengthens its presence.
How This Links to the Other Two Techniques:
This technique doesn’t exist in isolation.
- Use open questions to uncover what the other party values — so you know what to build conditions around.
- Use summarising to confirm shared understanding — before you make a conditional offer.
Then, when the moment is right, you can offer movement with meaning. Movement that’s anchored in fairness and mutual gain.
Final Thought... "YOU are going to FAIL if you don't PRACTICE with PURPOSE"
All three of these techniques — Open Questions, Summarising and If You Then We — are simple to understand, but powerful when used skilfully.
That’s why at The Negotiation Club we practice them over and over and ... over again.
We don’t just talk about them. We don’t just read about them. We rehearse them, reflect on them, tweak them and apply them in different contexts. That’s how skill is built — and confidence with it.
So my question to you is this:
"When was the last time you practiced these three techniques in a real negotiation scenario?"
If it’s been a while, you’re always welcome to join us at one of our Club sessions and give them a proper run.
....Because in negotiation.... doing always beats just knowing.
Try our FREE NEGOTIATION TASTER to practice your skills!
