How to Active Listen in Negotiation
An AI exploration of how negotiators can tell whether they are truly actively listening—and why this skill directly shapes trust and outcomes.
What The AI Explored in This Episode
In this AI-generated episode from The Negotiation Club, the focus is on a deceptively simple question: how do we really know if we are actively listening?
Rather than treating active listening as a mindset or attitude, the episode examines it as a set of observable behaviours that can be noticed, practised, and improved.
Why Intent Is Not Enough
A key theme of the episode is that wanting to listen is not the same as listening well.
Many negotiators believe they are actively listening because they are silent, polite, or nodding along. However, these behaviours do not necessarily demonstrate understanding. Active listening only becomes visible through what happens after the other party has spoken.
What Active Listening Looks Like in Practice
The episode explores how active listening shows up through:
- Accurate summarising
- Reflecting emotion as well as content
- Asking clarifying (not repetitive) questions
- Responding in a way that builds on what was said
These behaviours signal to the other party that they have been heard—not just tolerated.
The Cost of Poor Listening in Negotiation
When negotiators fail to listen actively, the consequences are often subtle but significant:
- Misunderstanding priorities
- Responding to positions rather than interests
- Creating unnecessary resistance
- Damaging trust without realising it
The episode reinforces that many negotiation breakdowns are caused not by disagreement, but by misheard or unheard information.
Listening as a Verifiable Skill
A central insight is that active listening can—and should—be tested.
If you cannot summarise the other party’s position in a way they recognise as accurate, you were not actively listening. This makes listening a verifiable skill, not a personal claim.
Turning Listening into Practice
To practise active listening, negotiators are encouraged to shift focus from responding to demonstrating understanding.
Try:
- Summarising before making any proposal
- Asking the other party to confirm or correct your understanding
- Observing how their tone and openness change once they feel heard
A dedicated Negotiation Card on Active Listening supports this practice by providing structured prompts and observer cues.